It's funny you mention "unalive" because I saw a Tweet yesterday that used it and I had to reread it so many times to understand what it was saying. There are so many eggshells to consider before you start tiptoeing through fandom now. I was too shy (and young) back in the LJ era of fandom to participate, but it definitely had a different vibe from what the loud fandom voices have now. So many things need disclaimers now because of how people organise witch hunts if someone so much as creates work featuring something they personally deem offensive. It's exhausting.

Your last line resonates. I'm really glad I saw this post and I hope that you're able to find that nice space in fandom where you can explore what you want to explore without fear of being judged or being required to defend yourself.